There I Always Something to be Grateful For

Hello, Friends!

I've spent the majority of the last few weeks flat on my back in bed with major back problems (lumbar stenosis, which may require surgery). Of course, it is never, ever convenient for a mother to be sick, but right now especially things are challenging. My son is home with a chronic illness that has him on "Home & Hospital Leave" with school and I am suppose to be his tutor..AND the husband really needs my support...AND...I have a lot to do, doggone it!

Okay, so I could whine right now, something at which I have a great deal of experience! :) But, you know, I can't help remembering another time like this when the sky was literally raining adversity all around me...

Years ago, when my dear Sarah was born (one of the MOST beautiful moments of my life), she was born at the end of a tremendously difficult pregnancy, the last four months of which I had to sleep sitting up in a chair because of the pain. The week before she was born, I stayed up all night, night after night, typing up my husband's papers for Finals. The day that ended I was abruptly put into the hospital (blood pressure), which began three grueling days of labor. Of course, once that's over, one can't go home and rest, because you return home with a tiny infant to take care of. That begins the sleepless nights of late night feedings. When Sarah was 9 weeks old, I had major surgery to repair the problem that had affected my pregnancy, which took me several months to recuperate from.

So, finally it is Christmas time, Sarah is three months old and I am finally strong enough to venture out of the house and go for a mother/daughter photo shoot at Sears. I am very weak, but we make it through everything just fine. While I am taking the elevator back down to parking, I am praying in my mind, complaining to the Lord about all of my trials and about how I don't feel equal to my tasks. Whine, whine, whine. Complain, complain, complain.

Suddenly, the elevator stops. The doors open and in comes this woman, pushing a front to back double-stroller, with a tiny baby in front, another tiny baby in back and THEN another tiny baby in a harness on her chest. Yes, this woman had TRIPLETS. And I will never forget her face. She looked like she'd had the guts kicked right out of her and was terribly exhausted. Oh, my goodness, I just wanted to hold her. Instead, I looked up at the ceiling and in my heart, I said, "Oh, THANK YOU, Heavenly Father, that I only had one baby to come home to after my surgery. Oh, thank you that right now I only have one to worry about. OH, thank you, thank you, thank you for all of my MANY blessings!"

It took about 60 seconds for me to have a whole attitude change. Why? Because the Lord showed me someone who was having an even harder time than I was, right at the moment when I was whining. What a paradigm shift.

So, When I am on the road to whining, Woe is me, things are so hard! I remember that dear woman and I remind myself that things could be so much more difficult than they are. And, the Lord gives us what we can handle, even if we can just barely handle it. :)

So, I give thanks today that for most of my life I have enjoyed good health. I have been able to do many things that I've always wanted to do and some things that I never dreamed I'd be able to do. I have had a really good run, most of the time. Now, that I am having some health problems, I am so thankful for medications for pain, and for health care and for many people who care about me and my family.

So, no whining and complaining!

Have a lovely Fall day!:)

Mothers Day - For More Than Just Our Mothers

Courtesy of All Posters

With Mother's Day right around the corner, I would like to pay homage not just to my own mother (who is now deceased) or even to my own role as a mother to my children, but, rather to the sweet women who have acted as mothers to me thoughout my life.

Despite the beautiful ideal of motherhood which we honor in the church, many of us have struggled with less that ideal cirumstances growing up. I personally was blessed with what felt like a near-perfect mother in my early years, but as the years wore on and troubles came, my mother was deeply overwhelmed and not always emotionally available to me. I was not raised in an LDS family, but, later, it was within the church that I have been nurtured by older women during important times in my life.

The stand-out example of this would be my friend, Holly. When my husband, Mark, and I were newly married and completing his education at the University of North Carolina, in Chapel Hill, I became pregnant with our first child. All was fine at first, as I combined outside employment with preparations to eventually become a full-time mother. However at 14 weeks, my left side swelled up and I began experiencing discomfort. A quick trip to the OB resulted in my being admitted to the hospital with a congenitally obstructed kidney. That's when the problems started. The doctors rigged me up to get me through my pregnancy without surgery, but in doing so I found that I could not continue my fast-paced job, I was in a lot of discomfort and had difficulty getting around, and would require major surgery soon after my baby was born. With my husband a full-time student and also working full-time, what in the world was I going to do for help and support when the baby came? My mother, who lived in neighboring Virginia, was disabled and could not be there for me, as much as she would have like to do.

In walked Holly H. to my life, an older woman in my ward with no dependent children. She had barely known me up to this point, but when she heard of my need, she immediately made me her business. She helped with household chores, brought food, and most important, became my friend. When the baby was born, she treated me as her daughter and my baby as her grand-child. When I went into surgery, she took my baby in for the weeks when I could not care for her and often cared for me, too.

The most wonderful part of all, though was that once I was well and could care for my daughter by myself, the relationship not only continued but flourished. My daughter, Sarah, and I had become a part of Holly's family. We are close to this day, 14 years later.

I am sure that I am not alone in my experience. Older women play such a wonderful role in the lives of younger women. They teach, love, support and inspire by example. And what a wonderful opportunity Mother's Day provides for us to extend our appreciation beyond family bounds to the other women who have nurtured us.

What can we do to make them feel appreciated?

Make a phone call.
If you have the resources, send an unexpected bouquet of flowers
Send a card or a letter
Spend a some time with them
Find a way to express your love

One never knows how long a beloved older friend will be with us. Remembering them at Mother's Day is the perfect way to express one's gratitude for they have done!

Love,
Elizabeth

My heart is very full of gratitude today for some recent blessings. Several days ago, while I was praying, I had a very strong feeling that I would soon be in contact with someone from whom I've been separated for a very long time. This was one of the closest friends of my life with whom I had a misunderstanding some 12 years ago. I have prayed about this situation many times over the years and believed that this problem would never be resolved in my lifetime. Then, several days ago, I had a strong feeling that I would be communicating with this person again soon. I didn't see how that could be, but I couldn't help feeling excited at the potential prospect. Yesterday, she contacted me. It came out of the blue and I was astounded when it happened. Our first communications have been sweet. I don't really know where any of this will go, but I am so r.e.l.i.e.v.e.d. I exhaled 12 1/2 years of hurt yesterday. It has left me exhausted and at peace.

I am so astounded by the Lord's ability to hear our thoughts and the longings of our hearts and then to answer so generously the presumed unanswerable. What can I say? What can one say to that? My heart resounds with gratitude. The words "thank you" are not enough to express to our dear Lord the feelings of my heart. My soul sings a wordless hymn, because words are not equal to how I am feeling.

I am also deeply grateful because a job prospect that my husband wants with all his heart is looking stronger and stronger. We will know for sure March 1st, but I am feeling greater confidence that all will be well for us.

How do I close this? I am still so...relieved. I feel like I could jump and sing and sleep for one hundred years, all at the same time.

Praise the name of Him who is above all and still tender and personal enough to reach down and touch a single soul in its quiet yearnings.

We are truly blessed.

Love,
Elizabeth